A Journey Through 8 Phases of Spiritual Development
© DR Phelan - Uplift Centre 2025
A guide for seekers, leaders, and companions
Introduction and context: We are integrated beings
Each dimension of our humanity is interwoven and influences the others. What affects one aspect, touches them all.
The physical self is our body: how we sleep, move, eat, and carry tension or energy.
The mental self is our thought life: beliefs, problem-solving, focus, and imagination.
The emotional self is our feeling world: joy, sorrow, fear, anger, contentment.
The spiritual self is our deeper self: meaning, purpose, values, awe and connection with the Sacred.
We are integrated beings. These aspects are like strings in a musical instrument — if one string is out of tune, the whole sound is affected. For example: If we are mentally consumed by constant worry, it can lead to emotional anxiety, physical symptoms like headaches or sleeplessness, and even spiritual dryness or disconnection. Likewise: A time of spiritual renewal or deep peace can calm the emotions, clear the mind, and bring healing to the body.
Healthy living and healing involve listening to all four dimensions — tending to the body, engaging the mind, honouring emotions, and nurturing the spirit. When these are aligned and cared for, we move toward greater wholeness, resilience, and joy.
We have written elsewhere about the stages of personal growth and the development of courage, resilience, character and wisdom in The Hero’s Journey and Hero to Wise Elder. Inevitably, our life journey is comprised of all our interwoven physical, mental, emotional and spiritual experiences, and the meaning we consciously and subconsciously, make of them.
This resource offers particular insights into the Spiritual aspects of this journey i.e. our lifetime search for meaning, purpose and deep joy.
The Spiritual Journey: Beyond Ladders—Toward Centres of Gravity
Across psychology, theology, and spiritual direction, Christian thinkers and mystics like James Fowler, M. Scott Peck, Janet Hagberg & Robert Guelich, Richard Rohr, Brian McLaren, Barbara Brown Taylor, Bill Plotkin, Constance FitzGerald, and the broader Christian mystical tradition – have observed that human spiritual growth tends to unfold in recognisable phases and recurring movements. Different models have been advanced, which despite differences in terminology, seem to share a common arc and trajectory: development begins with an ego-centric, survival-driven mindset and can mature toward a profound experience of love and unity with the divine.
I think it’s helpful to think of these phases not as a “ladder of worth” that we climb, but rather as fluid states of being — orientations we move through and often revisit. Each phase is like a dominant centre of gravity in how we relate to self, others, and the Ultimate. Each phase offers unique lessons. These stages are fluid – individuals may move back and forth, occupy more than one at a time, or revisit earlier outlooks when life circumstances change. Growth is often non-linear: people can loop back, straddle stages, or “recycle” earlier lessons as their journey unfolds. There is no skipping ahead to avoid the hard work of a given phase. In short, the path is a spiral of unfolding depth rather than a straight climb upward.
With these caveats in mind, we have outlined a framework of eight stages that attempts to braid together core insights from many fellow travellers who have gone before. People are encouraged to identify with where they are without judgment, as every stage has its own gifts and challenges. The goal is not to somehow force ourself into a different phase, but rather to fully experience and learn from each stage, allowing grace to move us toward greater love.
The Eight Phases of the Spiritual Journey
1. Survive & Control – "Secure me"
What we seek: Safety, certainty, clear morals
How we see God: Rule-maker, powerful external authority who blesses/punishes; religion as behavioural contract,
Gifts: Order, predictability, moral scaffolding, sense of belonging, structure
Challenges: legalism, fear-based religion, rigidity, magical thinking, us/them tribalism, authoritarian capture.
Common defenses: Projection (“the bad is out there”), splitting (all good/all bad), over-compliance or defiance.
Dwelling markers: High anxiety when rules/authorities are challenged; dependence on external validation.
Scriptural/theological echo: Mount Sinai Tablets from God (Exodus 19–20..23); Proverbs pedagogy; Job’s friends’ retributive theology (Job 4 onward).
Transition markers: Genuine curiosity; cracks in certainty; compassion breaking through black/white categories.
Helpful Practices: Structured rituals, community routines, supportive communities
2. Awakening & Recognition – "Someone found me"
What we seek: Connection, awe, grace, say a trusting “yes” to a larger Story/Presence
How we see God: Loving protector, personal friend, intervening; experience of being found.
Gifts: Joy, wonder, , hope, zeal, teachability, spiritual hunger, feeling spiritually alive
Challenges: Idealization of leaders, chasing emotional highs, spiritual consumerism
Common defenses: Denial of suffering/ambiguity; spiritual bypass via euphoria.
Dwelling markers: Chasing emotional highs; conflating God’s presence with felt consolation.
Scriptural/theological echo: Paul’s Damascus encounter (Acts 9:1–19); the Psalms of rescue / deliverance; the prodigal found (Luke 15:20–24).
Transition markers: Desire for substance, doctrine, community roots; sobriety after first enthusiasm.
Helpful Practices: Gratitude journaling, testimony/story-sharing, imaginative prayer, praise/worship, foundational study
3. Belonging & Conformity – "Shape me"
What we seek: an internalised coherent framework and a communal moral compass, clear identity
How we see God: Guardian of our group, guarantor of order and correctness.
Gifts: Moral clarity, discipline, solidarity, service, tradition transmission, clear guidance, loyalty
Challenges: Rigid certainty, avoiding questions, group conformity, in–out tribalism, suppression of doubt, authoritarian dependence
Common defenses: Rationalization, groupthink, scapegoating dissenters.
Dwelling markers: Anxiety around ambiguity; fragile identity when challenged.
Scriptural/theological echo: Pastoral epistles shaping order (1 Timothy, 2 Timothy, and Titus); Jesus’ critiques of performative religiosity (Matthew 6:1–18).
Transition markers: Emerging dissonance, questioning arising from suffering, hunger for authenticity.
Helpful Practices: Group worship, meaningful liturgy, mentorship, service with others
4. Achievement & Responsibility – "Let me lead"
What we seek: Productive purpose, calling, identity integrated with meaningful work - vocation/ministry/mission
How we see God: Partner, calling-giver, mission-giver, coach, partner; the Kingdom as project.
Gifts: Courage, leadership, entrepreneurship, innovation, community impact.
Challenges: Burnout, over-identification with work, saviour/messiah complex, activism as avoidance of interiority
Common defenses: Overwork, perfectionism, spiritualized grandiosity, control disguised as care.
Dwelling markers: : Chronic fatigue + indispensability narratives; dismissal of contemplation.
Scriptural/theological echo: Martha’s anxious serving (Luke 10:38–42); Paul’s thorn (2 Corinthians 12:7–10); Elijah’s collapse under the broom tree (1 Kings 19:3–9).
Transition markers: Disillusionment, failure, moral injury, or success that still feels empty.
Helpful Practices: Rest (Sabbath), Rule of life, spiritual mentorship, self-reflection, Examen of motives, shared leadership.
5. Disorientation & The Wall – "Break me open"
What we seek: Deeper trust, to be able to let go of control, images of God, and identity fusions; surrender.
How we see God: Silent, absent, or mysterious
Gifts: Honesty, depth, authenticity, humility, freedom from illusions, deeper compassion
Challenges: Doubt, grief, feeling alone, cynicism, nihilism, paralysis, de-conversion without integration
Common defenses: Intellectualisation, permanent deconstruction, bitterness, self-exile.
Dwelling markers: Prolonged cynicism, identity built on critique, spiritual numbness.
Scriptural/theological echo: Job’s protest (Book of Job, especially chapters 3–31); Jesus’ cry of forsakenness (Matthew 27:46); the “cloud of unknowing.”
Transition markers: Gentle openness, capacity to grieve, re-emergent tenderness, contemplative hunger.
Helpful Practices: Silence, spiritual companionship, lament psalms and journaling, centring prayer, wilderness retreats
6. Integration & Illumination – "Recentre me"
What we seek: Wholeness, inner peace, integrate head, heart, body, shadow, live from inner union
How we see God: Inner presence, gentle guidance, sacramentality of the ordinary.
Gifts: Calm presence, humility, interior freedom, acceptance of life's paradoxes, deep compassion.
Challenges: Feeling misunderstood by others in different phase, detached, subtle spiritual superiority
Common defenses: Quietism, tendency to use a calm spiritual posture (like “everything happens for a reason” or “I just trust God”) to avoid facing uncomfortable emotions or truths.
Dwelling markers: Stable contemplative rhythm; capacity to hold paradox without reactivity.
Scriptural/theological echo: “Christ in you, the hope of glory” (Colossians 1:27); Peter post-breakfast restoration (John 21:15–19); Emmaus burning hearts (Luke 24:32).
Transition markers: Desire to give away what one has become; natural movement toward hidden service.
Helpful Practices: Contemplation, creative expression, time in nature, : Contemplative prayer, Lectio Divina, embodiment practices (yoga, breath work)..
7. Compassionate Service – "Give through me"
What we seek: Loving service, genuine compassion, Love-in-action from abundance, not compulsion; to translate union into justice, mercy, and presence;
How we see God: Co-labouring Spirit; divine compassion, companion in suffering,
Gifts: Healing presence, gentle guidance of others, reconciliatory leadership, graceful activism.
Challenges: Compassion fatigue, setting boundaries
Common defenses: Over-functioning disguised as service; conflict avoidance.
Dwelling markers: Sustainable service, comfort and joy without spotlight
Scriptural/theological echo: The Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25–37); Barnabas the encourager (Acts 4:36–37…); Dorcas/Tabitha’s quiet works of mercy (Acts 9:36–42).
Transition markers: Deepening anonymity, effortless blessing - less up front, more supporting others; decreasing reactivity.
Helpful Practices: Deep listening, mentoring, restorative self-care, simplicity, spiritual eldership.
8. Unitive Love – "I am one with all"
What we seek: Becoming love itself; to empty ourselves and have God flow through us to others; life as prayer
How we see God: Present in everything, universal love
Gifts: Wisdom, peace, profound simplicity, spontaneity of love, joyful presence
Challenges: Being misunderstood, others’ expectations
Common defenses: Few; ego games largely dissolved—yet prudent boundaries remain
Dwelling markers: Serene joy, radical inclusion, forgiveness as reflex, anonymity embraced.
Scriptural/theological echo: : “I no longer live, but Christ lives in me” (Galatians 2:20); Jesus’ unity prayer (John 17:20–23); “God is love.” (1 John 4)
Helpful Practices: Silent abiding, quiet presence, blessing others, finding the sacred in everyday moments
Expanding on The Wall in Phase 5: Embracing the Turning Point
Many encounter a "Wall"—often in phase five—marked by loss, confusion, or divine silence. The Centre of gravity of this developmental phase is deconstruction, grief, impasse, dark night of the soul. Core markers include loss of God’s felt presence, collapse of explanatory frameworks, and forced surrender of identity-fusing roles. It can feel like being lost in a dark foreboding forest.
The psychological and emotional aspects of this phase are metaphorically described in stages 7&8 of the Hero’s Journey (See Approach to the Inmost Cave and The Ordeal in the Abyss).
The Wall is is a key transformation point. It is the turning of the ego: where our will meets God’s will (Hagberg & Guelich), where faith’s container shatters (Rohr’s “disorder”), where we encounter impasse and the dark night (FitzGerald, John of the Cross).
However, as difficult and uncomfortable as the Wall is - and this pain of inner transformation may last for several years - It is ultimately an invitation, not an obstacle. It's a chance to let go of old certainties and trust deeper truths.
But it is almost always a painful transition and transformation. Richard Rohr observes that the ego always resists surrender and loss of control. “The ego hates losing—even to God.” (Falling Upward). He says our ego will defend, project, and attack so as to avoid giving up our centre stage (Center for Action and Contemplation). Rohr calls the ego/“false self” a necessary but temporary identity that must be let go so the “true self” can emerge—something the ego resists. Rohr says our journey is about relinquishing control (not tightening it), learning to serve something larger than the ego’s projects (Center for Action and Contemplation).
Thomas Merton, the American Trappist monk and mystic, similarly says spiritual development is a journey from the false self (ego, illusion, role-playing) to the true self (our identity hidden in God). “To be a saint means to be myself... Therefore the problem of sanctity and salvation is in fact the problem of finding out who I am and of discovering my true self.” (New Seeds of Contemplation)
Bottom line about the “Wall”: The ego will not step aside on its own; it usually takes failure, “falling,” suffering, or conscious practices of letting go for the center of gravity to shift from egoic control to a life led by grace (the “true self”)
So, the wisdom of past travellers is to take your time here. Grieve, reflect, and trust the process.
Important Reminders
Spiritual growth is not linear. You may revisit phases many times.
Each phase has valuable lessons. No stage is "better" or "worse" than another. Each has essential gifts for a lifelong journey of transformation.
Your community may share a common phase. This influences your collective spiritual experience.
You are Not Alone
Wherever you find yourself—holding on, letting go, or opening up—remember, love is your guide. Trust the journey. Allow yourself to receive grace. You are supported every step of the way.
For a deeper dive:
James Fowler:
Fowler, J. W. (1981). *Stages of Faith: The Psychology of Human Development and the Quest for Meaning*. Harper & Row.
M. Scott Peck
Peck, M. S. (1978). *The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth*. Simon & Schuster.
Janet O. Hagberg & Robert A. Guelich
Hagberg, J. O., & Guelich, R. A. (2005). *The Critical Journey: Stages in the Life of Faith* (2nd ed.). Sheffield Publishing Company.
Richard Rohr
Rohr, R. (2011). *Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life*. Jossey-Bass.
Rohr, R. (2013). *Immortal Diamond: The Search for Our True Self*. Jossey-Bass.
Rohr, R. (2019). *The Universal Christ*. Convergent Books.
Brian McLaren
McLaren, B. D. (2021). *Faith After Doubt: Why Your Beliefs Stopped Working and What to Do About It*. St. Martin’s Essentials.
Barbara Brown Taylor
Taylor, B. B. (2014). *Learning to Walk in the Dark*. HarperOne.
Bill Plotkin
Plotkin, B. (2003). *Soulcraft: Crossing into the Mysteries of Nature and Psyche*. New World Library.
Plotkin, B. (2008). *Nature and the Human Soul: Cultivating Wholeness and Community in a Fragmented World*. New World Library.
Plotkin, B. (2021). *The Journey of Soul Initiation*. New World Library.
Constance FitzGerald
FitzGerald, C. (1984). *Impasse and Dark Night*. In P. Groves (Ed.), *Spirituality and the Secular Quest*. Crossroad.
Christian Mystical Tradition
Anonymous. (1981). *The Cloud of Unknowing*. (J. Walsh, Trans.). Paulist Press.
Teresa of Ávila. (1961). *The Interior Castle*. (E. A. Peers, Trans.). Image Books.
John of the Cross. (1959). *Dark Night of the Soul*. (E. A. Peers, Trans.). Image Books.
Brother Lawrence. (1982). *The Practice of the Presence of God*. Whitaker House.