When stress feelings well up
A simple exercise of calming
When stress feelings well up:
1. Take a deep breath, relax, and breathe out through your nose… Repeat…
2. Notice that this feeling of stress is how you are feeling. It is not who you are.
Instead of saying, I am stressed, say I am feeling stressed. Instead of saying I am anxious, say I am feeling some anxiety. You are more than your emotions.
3. Imagine stepping outside yourself and looking at what is going on. You can see the emotions but also your whole self - like some branches moving in the wind but you also see the much larger ocean that is also there.
Who is the You that observes yourself feeling anxious?
“I am bored” ….Who Knows this?
“I am angry, sad, afraid” …Who knows this?
Eckart Tolle: You are the knowing, not the condition that is known.
4. Create a non-judgemental space between your feelings and how you respond to them. They are just feelings, even if they feel really strong. The wind is blowing branches in front of you……yet the ocean is unaffected by such things … It’s ok.
5. Ask yourself: What the func? What function does it serve? Is this stress trying to tell me something about myself or the situation?
6. In your mind, can you take yourself to a beach that you have fond memories of. Imagine you’re standing on the beach looking out to the sea as gentle waves roll in to shore. .. Breathe…
What might the future you, in a few years time, look back and say about what’s stressing you at this time? What wisdom would you offer to your younger self?
Remember the ancient wisdom: This too shall pass….
Mentally Dropping Anchor can also be a helpful practice to help anchor yourself in a stressful situation e.g., in the dentist’s chair. See also Dropping Anchor Worksheet