On Stress - 10 Tips for feeling better
by Dean Phelan © Copyright 2022
1. Physical Exercise
At least three times per week get your heart pumping, puffing, sweat a little.
Stretching e.g., Yoga, Tai Chi, Pilates,
Walking the dog, bike riding, swimming, etc. – Latest research suggests 7500 steps per day
2. Recreational Activities
Make time for things you enjoy – a hobby, fun activities – something life giving.
Do something with your hands rather than head. Stop thinking for a while.
Lose yourself in a gardening project, draw or paint, craft work, sewing, make something …
Have breakfast out with a friend; take time out for a coffee up the street.
3. Time with Nature
Sit quietly by a stream for 20 minutes and let the sounds come to you.
Walk in a forest and breathe the air. Listen to the native birds.
Walk along the beach, feel the sea breeze. Listen to the waves.
Sit in the botanical gardens. Smell the flowers. Admire the soaring trees.
4. Music
Listen to good music, relax and stop thinking. Let the music come to you.
Try the classics – a comfy armchair in a quiet room with eyes closed - Mozart, Brahms
Relaxation, Chill playlist – flutes, religious organ music,
5. Share with someone
Get it off your chest, talk it out with a friend, someone you respect - a psychologist or counsellor if you’re really suffering.
Get your relationship with your partner right.
Get a good Doctor and agree a program to get you back on top.
Be part of your community – local Church, neighbourhood Club, Rotary, etc.
6. Quiet time
Set aside a regular time for contemplation and relaxation – daily if possible – Create a “sacred space” in your home – a chair near the window where you can sit and contemplate
Try a relaxation / calming skills app e.g. Calm
On Being is an absolutely marvellous resource for interviews, reading, poetry and quiet reflection
Read inspirational thoughts and sayings – the bible, meditations, readings; try dipping into The Meditations by Marcus Aurelius or The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran.
Just sit and listen to the hum of traffic, wind, daily sounds – don’t think.
7. An Attitude of Contentment
Practise what you deeply believe in and be content no matter what – It’s sometimes easier to just love, instead of trying to get everyone to love you.
“Lord grant me the strength to change what can be changed, To accept what can’t be changed, And the wisdom to know the difference.”
Notice and appreciate 5 things today – the smell of gardenias, the breeze on your cheek, the shape of the clouds, laughter on the wind, the freshly painted fence…
Give thanks for everything that brightens your day and makes you feel alive
8. Purpose
Have a purpose in your life – Browse Finding Purpose
Make a contribution – give something back - volunteer and help out
Enable one life to breathe a little easier
9. Positive Thinking
Do not indulge negative, destructive thinking – try the dropping anchor exercise
Substitute positive sayings. Read uplifting literature – try Comforting thoughts
Be intentionally positive - the glass is half full as well as half empty – both are true so you can choose which view is more helpful to you
Choose to be cheerful and of good courage – smile more and acknowledge the people around you.
10. Healthy Lifestyle Habits
Several major longitudinal studies over the past 25 years have shown with amazing consistency that there are seven old-fashioned “health habits”. The health of people with seven habits was better than those with six, those with six better than those with five, and so on down the line. The habits:
No smoking
Moderate drinking
Seven or eight hours sleep per night
Regular meals with no snacks in between – eat plenty of fruit and vegetables. The less processed food the better…go brown rice instead of white etc.
Breakfast every day
Normal weight – don’t stuff yourself - only eat until your 80% full
Moderate, regular exercise
And some Tips on managing everyday stress from The Australian Psychological Society
Stress is often described as feeling overloaded, wound-up, tense and worried, and occurs when we face a situation we feel we can’t cope with.
While stress is usually referred to as a negative experience, not all stress is bad. Some stress can be helpful, motivating us to get a task finished, or spurring us to perform well.
However, if stress is ongoing or the stress response continues over a long period, the effects of stress can impact negatively on our physical and mental health.
Recognise signs of stress
Signs of stress vary from person to person, but recognising your own personal signs can help you take positive steps.
Signs of stress might include tensing your jaw, grinding your teeth, getting headaches, having problems sleeping, or feeling irritable or short tempered.
Identify causes of stress
It is easy to plough on, day after day, without taking a step back and identifying what is causing you stress. Identifying stressors is the first step to doing something about them.
Use problem-solving
Sometimes the situation causing the stress can be changed, for example, by getting an extension on a school assignment or work deadline, changing jobs, or sharing the workload with a colleague. Problem-solving involves identifying the problem causing stress, writing down a list of solutions, working through the pros and cons of each, selecting the best one and trying it out, and evaluating its success.1
Change the way you talk to yourself
When we are stressed we sometimes say negative or self-defeating things to ourselves over and over. Unhelpful self-talk might include things like, “I can’t cope”, “I’m too busy to deal with all this”, or “I’ll never get this done”. Negative self-talk can make it more difficult to manage stress.
Notice your self-talk and work on using helpful, soothing and calming self-talk, such as, “I am coping well given what I have on my plate”, “Relax, this stressful time will pass”, or “This is a stressful situation, but what is one thing I can do to help me get through this?”
Keep things in perspective
When we are stressed, it is easy to see things as worse than they really are. Rather than imagining the worst-case scenario and then worrying about it, ask yourself:
Am I overestimating the likelihood of a negative outcome?
Am I overestimating how bad the consequences will be?
Am I underestimating my ability to cope?
Rehearse tackling stressful situations
If there is a stressful event coming up, prepare for it. Work on developing the skills you need to tackle the situation as well as you can. Rehearse the situation before you have to perform on the actual day. This might include imagining yourself successfully handling the situation, or setting up real-life rehearsals.13
Practise relaxation
Practising relaxation (such as autonomic relaxation, meditation or mindfulness) has been found to decrease stress. Meditation and relaxation techniques, if practised regularly, can help reduce stress levels by allowing the body and nervous system to settle and readjust to a calm state.
Organise your time
Research suggests that good time management can decrease stress, increase work and life satisfaction, and improve health.
Time management strategies include setting goals, prioritising and planning tasks, writing to-do lists, using a diary, setting reminders for jobs that need doing, delegating tasks that can be done by others, and grouping similar jobs that can be done together.
Create a better work-life balance
People sometimes become stressed when they devote too much time and energy to one aspect of their life, at the expense of other important areas.16
Think about how satisfied you are with different life areas (e.g., relationships, work, recreation, health, exercise) and whether you are devoting the amount of attention you would like to each. If not, think about how you could improve your work-life balance, making more time for some, and putting boundaries around others.
Taking time to wind down and enjoy relaxing activities is an important part of a balanced life and helps to reduce stress. Include relaxing activities such as gardening or reading, or activities you find uplifting such as listening to music, walking or dancing, in your daily or weekly routine.
Look after your health
Stress can affect your immune system and make you more vulnerable to a range of health problems. Keeping yourself fit and healthy by doing the following can increase your resilience to stress:
make sure you are eating healthy food and getting regular exercise
avoid using alcohol, tobacco and other drugs to cope.