Managing Anxiety
Some Steps to Manage Anxiety: A, B, C, & D.
Anxiety is our brain’s way of warning us of potential dangers. On many occasions this is a good and protective mechanism. However, sometimes we develop a habit of feeling anxious, even when there really is no immediate danger to us. Our anxiety is automatically triggered by some past association and anticipation .
It can be like rain falling on a hill. Over time the rain can cause furrows and each time it rains, the furrows in the ground get deeper as the water automatically runs down the paths it has created…it runs down these formed pathways as soon as it rains.
Using this analogy, in order to change the way the water runs when it rains (our anxiety habit) we need to go to the top of the hill, block the furrows and channel the rain to where we want it e.g. into a dam or rain tank for our garden. We need to practise new skills and develop habits that better enable us to lead the life we want.
There are three stages in an anxious reaction:
A The Activating Event - e.g “rain” which can be life-giving or flood-destroying depending on circumstances.
B Beliefs and Thoughts - these are often so automatic that we miss them; they just happen like the rain running down the hill; and
C Consequences - both emotions and behaviour.
And to manage anxiety, we can Dispute (D) the thoughts and beliefs or change our behaviour.
A - Activating Event:
Identify what makes you anxious. It could be a particular event, place or thing. e.g. someone yelling at you or a COVID lockdown being announced.
B – Beliefs and automatic thoughts:
Tune in carefully to your thought patterns each time you are anxious. Ask yourself what your mind is telling you. How are these beliefs unhelpful? What do your thoughts say about your core beliefs - the way you see the world? Your beliefs can give you clues about why you are anxious.
C – Consequences: emotions and behaviour:
Learn to recognise early signs of your anxiety: e.g. heart racing, sweaty palms, faintness, trembling, dizziness. How are your emotions linked to your behaviour? e.g. avoiding situations where you feel anxious
D – Dispute your beliefs and change your behaviour:
Remind yourself that you are anxious because of the beliefs and thoughts you have about the object / event, not because of the object / event itself. You are telling yourself, perhaps subconsciously, something fearful about the situation you’re in or anticipating to be in.
Practice relaxation / breathing / mindfulness and prayer to calm your mind and body.
Practice acceptance of what you can’t change and focus on the here and now. Try not to think about past events or worry about the future. If you do, you will stress yourself but you will not change anything.
Play “devil’s advocate.” What is the worst thing that could happen? Would you survive it and live to tell the tale? Often, worrying about the worst thing is worse than actually going through it.
Think about any unhelpful beliefs you have identified - Are these beliefs true? Look for evidence that they are NOT true. What are other, more helpful ways of looking at the same situation?
Look for evidence of where the object / event has been linked with a good outcome. For example, if you have had a bad experience in a shopping centre, try to think of all the times you have been to a shopping centre and enjoyed the experience.
We all have a tendency to avoid situations where we get anxious. Try to put yourself in these situations, practice these disputing techniques and make a note of all the times that you have a good outcome.
Another helpful Acronym is ACE
Acknowledging the difficult thoughts and feelings that are coming up in a non-judgmental, kind, or curious manner.
Connecting with your body. We may not have control of our thoughts and feelings but we do have control over our actions.
Engaging with the world around you and focusing attention on whatever aspects or moments of my present world are important and matter right now. This could be thoughts and feelings coming up or being present in the place you are right now.
See also the Dropping Anchor tool and A Prayerful Approach resource
And you might lose yourself for a while meditating on below. The same thing can be seen in different ways - maybe another perspective or insight on what is troubling you could appear. .
